Should you confront a friend about their fashion choices?

Elliot (No)

Confronting a friend about their fashion choices is not always a good idea. Firstly, a person's fashion choices express their unique personality; everyone's personality is different. Therefore, confronting someone about their fashion choices is like accusing someone of having the “wrong” personality. Friends might consider even a minor fashion tip to be an attack on their personality identity. If someone wants fashion advice, they’ll ask for it. Until that day comes, it makes sense to keep opinions reserved. There is no right or wrong when it comes to fashion, and everyone should have the opportunity to explore different forms of expression without being confronted by others. 

Indeed, some of the most innovative trends have emerged thanks to people who dared to challenge fashion norms. The first person who wore leopard print or camouflage most likely caused all kinds of uproar at their debut. A friend, in this sense, might actually be ahead of the curve in terms of fashion. Trends are constantly emerging, and your friend might be starting a new fashion movement. A friend might be aware of new trends that are not yet widely known. 

Finally, some fashion choices are ironic or satirical. For example, “dad sneakers” were once considered tacky, but even the loftiest fashion houses have fully embraced them. Some sneakers pay homage to the 80s, with certain models even including intentional scuff marks. New concepts such as “normcore” or “sleazecore” show that sometimes people intentionally try to look bad purely as a fashion statement. These are all reasons to avoid confronting friends about their manner of dress, as the world of fashion is simply too complex and too personal to risk such a statement. 

Elisa (Yes)

Honesty is an important quality in any relationship, but this is especially true of friendship. So, when it comes to uncomfortable topics, a true friend will tell you unpleasant truths. This is true regarding your friend’s fashion choices; however, there is an appropriate way to approach the situation. A five-step process involves letting your friends know you care, being upfront, asking if they want to dress that way and if they want to change, and finally, explaining how they can change. It may be important to discuss the psychology of dressing well, making it less personal to them.  

In other words, it’s all about sensitivity and your approach. When it comes to any uncomfortable topic, there is a proper approach. According to Psychology Today, speaking calmly, dropping your assumptions, and speaking clearly without using any hurtful or degrading words is good. In fact, it may even be good to let your friend come to a conclusion about their choices themselves. For example, asking open-ended questions like “What do you think of your outfit today?” Thankfully, there are many psychological tactics for handling sensitive topics gracefully. 

The point is that if someone is your friend, they deserve to know the truth, especially when it comes to their fashion choices. Consider the friend who always wears exercise clothing—even in inappropriate situations. Unfortunately, we are judged by our clothes. If you are in a true friendship, you have to set up a way to offer constructive criticism to one another without destroying your relationship. 

Besides, if an outfit didn’t suit you, you would wish a true friend would tell you before going out in public or heading to work to spare you any potential embarrassment. Honesty with friends is always the best policy.