Should you marry earlier or later in life?

Emily (Later)

Marriage is a beautiful, life-changing event that recognizes a couple's union. However, with it comes a significant amount of change and responsibility. Overseeing the relationship, financial health, and, if desired, growing a family with children and/or pets can add considerable stress to any pair. But, by waiting, couples can set themselves up for a successful, lasting union with less financial issues.

Research suggests couples that wed in their 30s have a lower divorce rate. One reason is that there is often more financial stability with two rather than one, and financial stability can ease stress. Older partners, often more established in their careers, tend to have higher combined incomes than younger couples, and economic stability is crucial. One poll revealed that 35% of respondents attribute relationship strain to financial issues. Partners without financial worries also have greater purchasing power. They can meet meaningful, costly life goals like investing in property or starting a family, which in the US costs about $13,000 in the first year of their child’s life, excluding birth expenses.

Moreover, delaying marriage enables couples to develop a growth mindset, which can help romantic relationships as partners learn to communicate and support each other better. Furthermore, 70% of married couples lived together first before getting married, so couples may not feel as rushed to get married as they did in the past. As long as there is commitment, there is no need to rush into marriage. As the sayings go, slow and steady wins the race, and haste makes waste. All this to say, couples that take their time assessing each other's compatibility before becoming increasingly financially and relationally entangled should be commended for acting carefully. 

Gina (Earlier)

Marriage is a “boots on the ground” learning experience you cannot fully prepare for. Rather, a couple that marries early can work together to create something lasting and true, especially since both young partners are eager to succeed, malleable, and capable of growing together. Many advantages can be had that benefit couples who marry early.

Marrying early in life allows a couple to co-create a life together rather than trying to make a partner fit into an existing life. Waiting until later in life to marry makes it difficult to change habits. Co-creating allows the couple to build a life rather than merge two lives that are already distinct and mostly set in their ways. 

Marrying early also allows a couple to learn how to resolve conflict earlier in their marriage, allowing them to spend more time understanding each other’s needs and the best way to communicate with one another. This affords them more years to live together, happier and more peaceful in their relationship. Marrying earlier in life allows the individual to have a support system as they navigate their way through college and career development. Having someone to lean on during these strenuous times eases tension and can be helpful in managing the workload. 

Yet another advantage to marrying earlier in life is that it gives more time for family expansion, potentially having relationships with your grandchildren and great-grandchildren, and developing closer relationships with one another’s families, allowing for stronger relationships with in-laws.

Although marriage is beautiful, it can also be tough. Marrying earlier in life allows partners to provide support, create a life together, establish problem-solving skills early, expand families, and grow closer to one another’s relatives, allowing the couple to live their later years in harmony.