Are marriage prenups a good idea?

Emily (No)

Getting engaged is usually a joyous occasion. However, a prenup can quickly bring those incredible, seventh-heaven feelings to a gut-wrenching low. It can erase the pureness and beauty of marriage's promise to commit and love each other “till death do us part.” Prenups, in a way, are like a business transaction where both parties entering the agreement need to safeguard their assets for when the union ends.

While prenups are put in place to protect, they aren’t always created equally and can still favor one spouse over the other. For this reason, it’s recommended both parties use different lawyers to ensure fairness. However, prenups can be costly, and each person might not be able to afford a competent lawyer to represent their half justly. 

Also, prenups aren’t always necessary. For example, if one is mainly interested in avoiding premarital debt, they should research their state laws or, if they can, seek legal advice. This kind of debt may be considered separate and isn’t subject to division during divorce.

Moreover, prenups can be costly. According to a 2024 survey, they average around $8,000 per couple. This can cause unnecessary financial stress, especially when budgeting for a wedding, honeymoon, or purchasing a house to start a life together.

Furthermore, a prenup can destroy a marriage before it’s even happened. A national prenuptial statistic highlighted that 63% of people would feel intimidated or more likely to divorce if asked to sign a prenuptial agreement. To save a marriage before it’s even started, it’s best to “Trust in the tradition of marriage as a sharing of everything, including finances” rather than with a prenup.

Gina (Yes)

Marriage is a union, merging two individuals into one cohesive force. Although couples enter the union with the intention of it lasting forever, the divorce rate in the US is 40-50%, which makes getting a prenup a good idea. 

Discussing difficult topics early, like finances and prenups, helps build a solid marriage foundation. When couples clarify their expectations of how money will be handled, it helps avoid misunderstandings later. Discussing such vulnerable topics before exchanging their nuptials can dissolve insecurities and build a stronger bond between the couple. 

Many people come into relationships having built a legacy they plan on sharing with heirs. Prenups ensure that those inheritances remain protected in the event of a divorce. Prenups also ensure that family heirlooms or sentimental objects also stay within the family.

Divorce is, unfortunately, a very common ending in marriages today. Emotions are high when it comes to dismantling a life you created together. A prenup reduces stress if a divorce should occur, helping each person to remain calm and rational. Prenups are designed to protect both parties. Divorce tends to bring out the worst in couples; resentment forms, and it is essential that each person is protected from being taken advantage of. A prenup also protects each person from the other’s debt that was brought into the marriage. 

Although prenups can be a delicate subject when entering into a marriage, they should be looked at as an insurance policy, protecting one another’s assets from the unforeseen. Once viewed as something exclusively for the rich and the famous, prenups are for everyone and are a good idea.